Hey DuckButt!
by outofchalk
Summary: Sasuke Uchiha is just an average boy with a problem. Actually let's make that two, a kitsune named Naruto and a failing succubus who goes by the name Sakura. As soon as these demons arrive, Sasuke starts to experience one crazy, messed-up life.
1. Prolouge sort of

**_Konichiwa, Prince Mocha here with a brand new story. I had this idea in mind for quite a while now and it's time, I wrote it down on paper! Erm, well on FanFiction. So enjoy the story of Mr. DuckButt and His Demon Friends._**

**_Disclaimer: Naruto is not mine. As much as I want to own it, I have a world to conquer. _**

**_*This chapter is a prolouge of Sasuke's younger days. When he met his demon "friends", Sakura and Naruto. Let me tell you this now, Sakura is a **succubus (I couldn't find any other female demons) and Naruto is a kitsune. **_**

**_*Be aware that I'll use strong language. I mean, really strong language._**

**_*No romance, ick! I hate romance! But there will be crushes and stuff._**

**_*This story won't have a REAL plot to it. It's just humorous stuff that I wrote down._**

**_*I might use Japanese Honorifics. I MIGHT!_**

**_*Last warning I promise, there would be hints of BL (yaoi). It will fail though because I never wrote yaoi in my entire life._**

**_Now enjoy the story of Mr. DuckButt and his Demon Friends!_**

* * *

><p><strong><em>Prolouge (Sort Of)<em>**

'_Aikotoba wa: Afuro to Gunso_  
><em>AFURO! (afro) GUNSO! (gunso), 3, 2, 1, Faiya!'<em>

_The ringing of the black phone on the kitchen counter boomed loudly in the residents of the Uchiha's. It echoed throughout the kitchen and a raven haired boy with a unique hairstyle jumped up from his seat and stood up, following the sound of the music._

_"Mommy, phone!" The voice of the cute, infamous 5-year-old Sasuke Uchiha sang. He giggled to the funny ringtone and ran over to his mother who was in the living room watching a boring reality show about a woman who bitches about her life and how "terrible" it is._

_"Mommy! Mommy!" The boy chanted. "Your phone, your phone!" He jumped of excitement. _

_The woman turned slowly to see her youngest son jumping up and down as if he just act the last of the Halloween candy._

_"Sasuke, dear. What is it?" The mother, Mikoto Uchiha, spoke gently to her hype son._

_"Your cellphone, Mommy! I-It say funny words. L-like "A-afuro"! What's a "afuro", Mommy! Is it a candy? I enjoy candy! Mommy, can Itachi-nii take me to get candy one day?" The boy said, tilting his head cutely as his mother chuckled at his behavior._

_"Maybe, Sasuke. Why don't you ask him. I'm sure he'll be more than happy to take you." She said, giving a gentle smile._

_Sasuke nodded his head as he skipped back to the kitchen with his mother. Mikoto picked up her ringing phone and answered it while watching her son climb up on a chair and stand on it, grabbing a pink crayon and drawing a special picture. _

_"Moshi, Moshi." She whispered into the phone, hugging herself with her left arm. A few moments later, her eyes widen in shock._

* * *

><p><em>Sasuke gripped onto the orange fox in his hand as he watched his mom pace back and forth gathering things. He tiltled his head in confusion. "M-mommy, what's going on? Are you okay? Where's Daddy?" He spoke, wiping his eyes with the back of his hands.<em>

_Mikoto wiped her hands onto her light-yellow apron. She bit her thumb as she looked down at her worried son. "Nothing, Honey. I'm fine." She smiled calmly. "Your father however..." Her voice trialed off as her smile faded into a weak frown. She swallowed hard and spoke softly. "Your father... well... he's in bad condition right now."_

_"Like sick?" Sasuke asked, blinking._

_"Y-yeah, Sasuke. Sick..." Salty, wet tears poured down the woman's face as she covered her mouth with her hand. She couldn't bear having her youngest son seeing her like this; weak and depressed. "I-I'm sorry Sasuke, you should go take a nap now..."_

_"Okay, Mommy." Sasuke whispered, hugging his mother's leg with a small smile. "And Mommy?" He looked up at his sobbing mother._

_"Yes?" She spoke, her voice cracking as she did._

_"I love you."_

* * *

><p><em>"Sasuke, you should be more like your brother, Itachi." An old lady spoke as she stroked a gray cat on her lap.<em>

_"But Aunt Uruchi, Itachi-nii is a meanie face. He always teases me and calls me Saucey! He and his mean friends." Sasuke complained to the white haired woman._

_"Sasuke, your eleven now. You should be mature by now." The lady said with a nod._

_"But, I don't want to be mature! I want to be a kid! Forever!" He yelled, scooting out of his chair and running out his chair with tears filling his onyx eyes._

* * *

><p><em>"Mister, are you okay?" A tiny voice spoke to Sasuke as he cried underneath a tree as rain pounded onto the green grass.<em>

_"I'm fine!" Sasuke said strongly as he looked up to see a bright pink haired girl with green eyes wearing a short red cheongsam with white circular designs with long sleeves. On her head was dark brown circular brown horns similar to a sheep and a red ribbon pulling back her hair. Sasuke gasped and fell backwards as he noticed the girl had black bat like wings behind her back and a long, thin tail that ended with a heart-shaped tip._

_The girl blinked and giggled at the raven boy's reaction. "I'm sorry, Mama told me this might happened if I approached a human unexpectedly." She said, holding out her hand to help him up._

_Sasuke scooted backwards until his back hit the tree behind him. "B-back away, from me!" He said, grabbing for a stick._

_The girl pouted and stood up straight with her hands on her hips. "Don't worry, . I promise I won't bite you." She muttered._

_Sasuke's eye twitched. Mr. DuckButt? What kind of name is that? He shook his head. "Look, I should get going. My Aunt must be looking for me." He mumbled, getting up and sending the girl a glare._

_"Oh wait! You can't go now! I need to ask you a favor." The girl said, swaying her tail side to side._

_"What kind of favor?" Sasuke asked, raising a brow._

_The pink hair girl smirked. "I need you to sleep with me."_

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><p><em><strong>OUTRO OF DARKNESS! Haha, I give you a beautiful cliffhanger. And also, I won't introduce our favorite Kitsune until later. Reviews are nice to have. Flames are nice. Writing Tips are love. Thanks for reading, sorry if it sucked.<strong>_


	2. Please Sleep With Me, Ducky!

**_**_Disclaimer: Naruto is not mine. As much as I want to own it, I have a world to conquer._**_**

**_*This chapter is a timeskip of the prolouge. About 3 years later._**

**_*Be aware that I'll use strong language. I mean, really strong language._**

**_*No romance, ick! I hate romance! But there will be crushes and stuff._**

**_*This story won't have a REAL plot to it. It's just humorous stuff that I wrote down._**

**_*I might use Japanese Honorifics. I MIGHT! And some basic japanese._**

**_*Last warning I promise, there would be hints of BL (yaoi). It will fail though because I never wrote yaoi in my entire life._**

**_Now enjoy the story of Mr. DuckButt and his Demon Friends!_**

* * *

><p><strong><em> Chapter One: Please Sleep With Me, Ducky!<em>**

It was a calm afternoon in the Konoha District of Tokyo, Japan. The relaxing, spring breeze filled the air along with the laughter of children and the cheers of teenagers.

_**'Kuchibiru ni doku wo nutte boku no heya ni kita deshou? **_  
><em><strong>Anata no kisu de mou karada mo mune mo toketeshimaisou <strong>_  
><em><strong>Daikiraina boku juukyuusai <strong>_  
><em><strong>Daikiraina boku juukyuusai'<strong>_

The succubus stared out the window and swayed her tail from side to side to the rhythm of music. "Mr. DuckButt, when can we go outside and play?" She asked, looking back at a very irritated raven haired teen.

The boy's eye twitched at the idiotic nickname. "Damn it, Sakura! How many times do I have to tell you?.! Don't. Call. Me. Mr. DuckButt!" He yelled, his face flushing with fierce anger.

_**'Hakike ga suru kurai anata no kokoro utsukushii no ni **_  
><em><strong>Nani hitotsu dekinai boku ni doushite kisu shite kureru no? <strong>_  
><em><strong>Daikiraina hibi juukyuusai <strong>_  
><em><strong>Daikiraina kao juukyuusai'<strong>_

The pink haired girl blinked and pouted slightly, "B-but Ducky-sama, calling you Mr. DuckButt is really cute." She whined, standing up from the window and leaning on the angered boy.

"It's not cute! It's stupid!" He spat as he leaned backwards to push the girl off of him. "I told you to call me Sasuke. And Sasuke only."

Sakura fell to the floor with a soft whimper. Tears built up into her emerald green eyes. "B-but, calling you Saucegay i-is what humans call you!" She cried dramatically. "Are you saying I'm just a human to you?.! I thought I was more special to you! I'm a succubus, a demon! Not a human!"

_**'Kuroage hachou no you ni hokorashii hane de tobitai **_  
><em><strong>Kudaranaitte iwanaide sonna jinsei ga ii no ii no...'<strong>_

Sasuke sighed of irritation and stood up from his work and held out a hand to the crying demon. "Get up and shut up before my brother comes in here. I already have enough problems and his bitching about how I should treat girls shouldn't be one of them."

Sakura blinked as warm salty tears continued to pour down her pale cheek. She looked at the flushed raven haired boy and smiled gently with a nod. She grabbed his hand and Sasuke helped her up to her feet.

"There, bet- Wah!" Sasuke shrieked as Sakura tackled him to the ground.

"Sleep with me!" Sakura yelled excitedly, sitting on Sasuke's stomach and wagging her tail like a dog.

* * *

><p>"Sasuke? Is that you? I thought I heard you screaming like the wuss you are." The older Uchiha brother, Itachi, said calmly as he opened Sasuke's door.<p>

The aura of the room became silent and awkward as the older Uchiha saw his little brother being pounced on by the sex demon.

"Oh, Mr. Itachi-nii. Good Afternoon!" Sakura said with a smile, shifting uncomfortably when she felt Sasuke struggle beneath her. "Sorry if Mr. DuckButt and I were loud. I know how dedicated you are with your work." She looked at the dull black haired man who was now smirking at his little brother.

Itachi chuckled and shook his head. "No, it's fine. I'm sorry for interrupting. Please, excuse me." He said, closing the door.

"No, wait! Itachi! Come back! It's not what you thi-" The door slammed shut before Sasuke could finish his sentence.

"ITACHI!" Sasuke yelled furiously as the older walked down the hall to his own room.

"It's about time Sasuke got laid." Itachi said with a devilish smirk.

* * *

><p>"Whoa, Sasuke, you look horrible, man!" Laughed a boy who looked about sixteen years old and with snow white hair tinted with light blue and dark purple eyes. He slapped Sasuke's back <em>hard<em> and laughed again. "Doesn't he, Jugo?"

Jugo, a 6.6 foot tall spiky orange haired and calmed face eighteen-year-old boy, nodded and smiled. "Yes, you look a bit under the weather Sasuke." He spoke in his calm, quiet voice.

"More like he's in the heat!" The white haired boy howled thrusting his hips in a suggestive matter. He laughed again along with Jugo. He stopped his hip motions and put an arm around the slouching raven haired boy.

"So Sasuke, who was the lucky girl? Was she blonde? Or brunette? Busty? Or flat? Sexy? Or hot?.! Or was she not a girl at all?" He cooed with a smirk as he saw Sasuke's face flush a tint of pink.

"So help me, Suigetsu. If I weren't so worn out right now, I would of punched that smirk right off your face!" Sasuke hissed.

"So you did get laid!.?"

"Die in hell, bastard."

Suigetsu pouted. "Aw, Sasuke, you hurt my feelings." He mumbled, looking at Sasuke with pitiful eyes.

Sasuke raised a brow as he pushed Suigetsu off of him to the ground. "Whatever." He muttered, looking away. He glanced down at his watch.

"Where the hell is she?" He hissed to himself.

"Sasuke-kun!" A girl voiced yelled from a distance.

"She's here." Jugo said with an expressionless look.

"It's about time." Suigetsu mumbled, wiping dirt off his grey jeans,

"Sasuke-kun! I'm so sorry I'm late! I had to lie to my mom saying that I was going to the mall with some friends because I know she won't let me go anywhere with three boys. She's too overprotective!" A girl with ruby red eyes and red long hair that was perky and unkempt on the right side and pinned down straight on the left side.

"Don't worry about it," Sasuke said, handing her brown glasses which she put on quickly. "Karin."

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><p><em><strong>Cliff hanger! Is it too short!.? <strong>__**Oh Kami-sama, I'm sorry! I promise to make a longer chapter next time! Anyway, what's going on?.! Who are these people, Sasuke is wiht!.? What happened to him and Sakura last night!.? Find out next time on Digimon, Digital Monster! *shot***_

_**Review are cool, Flames are hot, Advice is nice, and everything else is edible. Even I'm edible, but that my dear children is called "cannibalism".**_


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